From Striving To Free

There’s a seemingly endless cycle of striving that goes on inside my heart almost every single day of my life. It’s a striving that is natural to human beings; yet, somehow, it surprises me how often it’s a battle I have to fight. And this striving (which means “to make great efforts to achieve or obtain something”) is the battle to do life in my own strength and for my own glory. It shows up in the way that I fear man, want to always be liked, and my desire to be in control.

I want to make money so that I can live a comfortable life and buy the things that I want or that I think will make others think I’m a cool person. I want my family to appreciate me, so I clean the kitchen and make supper. I want God to love me, so I read my Bible. I truly don’t think these things, in and of themselves, are evil or sinful. But I’ve twisted something along the way.

I’ve started living to be loved, and that’s a scary place to be in. The praise of man quickly fades. I can do something that gains attention, but the next instant hurt someone or do something sinful that can cause others to want to turn their backs on me. Living to be loved can be a lonely, frustrating place that has no lasting results.

And in relation to God, living to be loved can bring feelings of shame when maybe I’m not doing as much as I could. Not because God puts that shame on me. He brings conviction when needed. But in Romans 8:1, it says that there is no condemnation for those of us who are in Christ Jesus. I often think sitting in those feelings of shame will punish me and somehow make me want to live more surrendered to the way God wants me to live though.

The truth is, sitting in those thoughts can’t change what I’ve done in the past, but it can keep me from what God wants next for me. Sitting in those thoughts can keep me stuck in the mindset of living to be loved by God instead of living from the love that He has for me.

And that’s the switch that needs to happen in my brain. I stay stuck in fear paralysis. I’m worried that I’ll fail, so I don’t try new or hard things. I’m worried people won’t like me, so I don’t start conversations. And a lot of things are more complex than that. There are often many different reasons behind the choices that we all make.

What matters most is that we realize we can’t add to the work on the cross, that we come to a place where we know that no matter what, we are loved by the King of the universe and are one of His children. And from that place of love and contentment in Him, we have the honor and privilege of serving Him and serving those around us. It’s freedom. And it’s freeing.

As I thought about what verse I wanted to share at the end of this post, Galatians 2:21 came to mind. This verse has helped me see more clearly the mindset of works-based faith that I easily slip into. It's helped me see that if it’s humanly impossible for humans to be perfect, then it’s impossible for me to be perfect. It's opened my eyes to the fact that the law doesn’t save me. Jesus is the only way, truth, and life, and I can’t be with the Father without Him. So, I don’t have to try so hard to live in my own strength.

“I do not set aside the grace of God; for if righteousness comes through the law, then Christ died in vain.” – Galatians 2:21