Five Loaves and Two Fish

Sweat drips off my brow. My muscles ache and my breath comes in quick, short gasps. I force my hands to grip the mop in my slippery hands, as I try to scrub the dirty, dusty floors for the third time this week. Soon I fall back in exhaustion, angry at the lack of progress and repetition of it. I look out the window at the smoggy sky and question, “God, I thought you asked me to do this. I thought you wanted me to serve these people. Why is it so difficult?” I hear Him answer, “Why are you doing it?” Frustrated I shout, “Because you asked me to do it!” “I did, but you heart has changed. You’re doing it for attention, for appreciation, and not out of a love for Me. Not out of a love for these hurting people who are also My children.” I was still angry. “But how is this going to show your love to them? It’s just a dirty little floor.” “Yes, but it’s teaching you something. And the Bible studies and prayer meetings in this room are going to change people’s lives and effect eternity. And because of you, it’s going to happen in a spotless room. It’s a picture of how I can take broken things and make them new. I can take dirty, sinful hearts and make them clean. And no matter how mundane and meaningless this is, it’s making an impact on my Kingdom.”  

Early this week I was reading in Luke chapter 9. Verses 10 through 17 cover the story of when Jesus fed the five thousand. It’s also written from another follower of Jesus’ perspective in Matthew chapter 14. A couple things stuck out to me this time reading it through.  

1.       The disciples had just gotten back from their missionary journeys. Jesus had sent them to heal the sick, cast out demons, and to share about the kingdom of God. They had seen how God could work through them. But I wonder if they forgot that it was God’s power working and nothing that they had done, besides being a willing vessel.

2.       It looked like an impossible situation – feeding five thousand men (and probably many women and children too), while only having five loaves and two fish to feed the whole crowd. In a normal situation, one without Jesus, it would have been impossible to use that little and everyone leave fed and happy. But verse 17 says that “they all ate and were satisfied…”

So, when we’re feeling like what we’re contributing to the kingdom isn’t enough, or what we’re doing doesn’t look like how other people are serving, or if we’re wondering if we’re even having an impact on the world for Jesus, we can think of this story written in scripture.

No matter how little we have to offer, (if it feels like all we have is five loaves and two fish,) God can use it to do great, unimaginable things to bring Himself glory, show other people His love, and give us the joy of serving others. We can stop worrying and striving. We can stop looking for appreciation. If God wants to give that to us He will. But He meets us in those moments, when we feel we’re doing it for nothing, and can bring a smile to our faces showing us that we’re making HIM smile by serving others.

“…Not by might, nor by power but by my Spirit, says the LORD of hosts.” Zechariah 4:6b

What’s your next step? Mine is asking God to show me opportunities where I can serve others. :)

Peace and love,

Hannah